June 21, 2012

Why?

Do you ever find yourself saying "Why?"...

Why me?
Why them?
Why is there so much violence?
Why is there so much hate?
Here lately I find myself constantly asking "Why sickness?" and sadly enough...we'll never know the answer. I know we can't all live to be 200 years old and remain healthy as a horse but I feel like the older I get, the more sickness and death I hear about and I can't help but hate it. It hurts my heart.

Though I've dealt with death, dying and losing a loved one, it will never be something that I'm okay with.

My very best friend's mom is dying. She's not even 60. After going in to have her ear checked out for a minor earache, she was diagnosed with adenocarcinoma and a 50% chance of surviving. Her first 16 hour surgery removed part of the cancer but not all. What it did remove was part of her jawbone, leaving one side of her face completely paralyzed. But she was okay. She came out of the surgery, would begin receiving treatment via chemo and radiation and she was on her way to recovery.

Or so everyone thought...

Back in February, she was given 6 to 18 months and I thought that was a dagger to my heart.
As of last Tuesday, she has 3-6 weeks.

WEEKS.

I'm sorry. I know this is all so heavy and it is definitely something I never thought I'd be writing about but I just want everyone to realize how important each and every day is. Sometimes we get so caught up in everything we do on a daily basis, you know, work, working out, shopping, blogging, watching The Bachelorette, etc...and we forget how precious life really is. We're never promised tomorrow.

I saw this on Pinterest the other day and it really hit home:

Sometimes we lose sight of what really matters so I thought this was the perfect reminder.
It's incredibly difficult to see my very best friend go through something so traumatic at such a young age. Her mom, Mrs. Joni, has always been known as "Momma #2" to me because growing up, that's exactly what she was. From letting us sleep outside on the trampoline, to never missing a single softball game of ours, to covering for me when I got caught sneaking out of the house one night (Sorry, mom. Still haven't told you that story...), she was always there for us. I confided in her numerous times before even going to my own mother because she just always gave the best advice...the kind of advice you know you'll hear from your own mom but would rather hear it from someone else and actually listen to them.

Don't even get me started on her cooking...talk about home cookin'! She was, still IS and always WILL be the queen of homestyle meals.

Though Mrs. Joni is sick, very sick, I just pray that she, my very best friend, Julie, and her family find comfort in all of this. Coming from someone who's lost a parent before, I sure do hope they can one day find peace with themselves and with God for the situation they've been handed. I know how incredibly hard it is to see the pot of gold at the bottom of the rainbow but I know Julie, Lara and Billy are strong and they will keep Mrs. Joni and her memory alive for many, many years to  come.

To my very best friend in the whole wide world:
Julie Anne: I don't think you even read my blog but if there's ever a day you just so happen to come across this, I just want you to know that I love you with every inkling of my heart and it kills me to see you go through something so tough. Please know that God will never put you through something you can't handle and Lord knows you have always been one tough cookie. ;) Just as you were there for me when I lost my daddy, I will always be a shoulder to lean on when you need me, a phone call away just to chat or a few miles down the road when you need a friend to snuggle with. You will forever be my very best friend and we all know you will always be your momma's boo. <3
If you find it in your hearts, please say a quick prayer for Julie and her family. I know they would definitely appreciate it and so would I. xoxo

38 comments:

  1. Such a sad story! Will keep your friends family in my prayers!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Julie I am thinking about you and your family at this time. Sending lots of thoughts and prayers.

    Selena

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am crying as I read this. I lost my mom to cancer last year. I am so sorry for your friend.

    ReplyDelete
  4. How sad!! :( I'm definitely sending some good wishes!

    ReplyDelete
  5. So sad to read this.. Sending lots of lots & prayers!

    Clarissa

    ReplyDelete
  6. my heart hurts for your best friend but beauty will be found in all this pain!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Stephanie, I'm so sorry for what you, your Friend, and your families are going through. This post just brought me to full on tears. My thoughts and prayers are with y'all through this tough time.

    xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  8. This breaks my heart. I'm thinking of you and your dear friend and her family. xoxo.

    ReplyDelete
  9. This just breaks my heart. I will definitely be praying for her and her family and you as well. xoxo

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am so sorry to hear this. My sisters and I were told we'd have 6-9 months with my mom when her cancer came back, she was gone 3 weeks later. Everyone told me to be strong, and it was such a relief when one person told me I didn't have to be.

    My heart and prayers go out to your friend. I know you know this too, but treasure each moment and say I love you a lot. There is no such thing as too much loving in those last weeks.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I am so sorry to hear this! I was just thinking of that recently - that the older I get, the more often these things seem to happen. Or the closer they hit to home, I suppose, when it's your own friends, not your parents', that are enduring that kind of pain. Grieving for a friend is an entirely different kind of grief too - you hurt that they are hurting. Will say a prayer for your friend and her mom, and for you, that you might find comfort and be able to comfort your friend as well.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Keeping you in thoughts and prayers! It's like you said...

    GOD WILL NOT GIVE SOMEONE MORE THAN THEY CAN HANDLE.

    Her mama is just leaving her temporary home and will see her family again someday!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. My heart hurts reading this. I love Jules and Im so sad shes going through this. Please keep me updated!

    I love you too

    ReplyDelete
  14. I will definitely be praying for this sweet lady and her family. Miracles do happen- I fully believe in that. Praying that whatever happens, the family will be strong and get through it together.

    I literally got chills reading that quote from Pinterest. Such an incredible reminder, thank you.

    ReplyDelete
  15. This post breaks my heart. I cannot imagine losing my mom. She is my best friend and who I go to for everything.

    Love that you did an entire post just for this family. You can tell you are very close with them and have a lot of love for your friend and her mom.

    Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Wow this is such a heartbreaking story. They're in my thoughts.

    ReplyDelete
  17. In my thoughts and prayers :( thinkin of jules and her family!

    ReplyDelete
  18. I cannot imagine going through something like this. Praying hard for your friend, her family, and especially her mom.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Praying for Julie & Mrs. Joni & all of their family as well as you.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Sending thoughts and prayers to Mrs. Joni and her family...I could not even begin to imagine the pain this family is going through. I hope the Lord can grant them some sort of peace and I hope He hears all of our prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Your post really hit home. I have a good friend who lost her sister to breast cancer on my friend's 21 birthday (she was only 28). That was 8 years ago almost, but her birthday is just around the corner. I was just thiking while driving home yesterday about it and how my friend and I have lived longer than her precious sister got to. Life is something that we all take for granted and shouldn't. I'll be praying for you and your friend. (Sorry for the LONG comment!)

    ReplyDelete
  22. Omgosh Steph, I'm so sorry. I'm sending up some big prayers my dear. Life is something that is way too precious and people take it for granted. Thank you for the reminder. I can't wait to see you and hug you and remind you that I'm thankful for you! XO!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Steph. Oh my - You have me in pieces over here. My heart is breaking for your friend, her family and for you. I don't know why, but I was feeling like I needed a good cry, and this gave me that. Life is SO fragile. SO FRAGILE. Why must bad things happen to good people?! Why!!! Ugh...

    ReplyDelete
  24. praying now! You have such a sweet heart Mrs Steph and it radiates through this little blog of yours. I hope one day to meet your sweet heart in person :)

    ReplyDelete
  25. Prayers going out for your friend and her mom. I can't even imagine what this must be like. Thank you for the reminder that life really is precious and not something to be taken for granted. Thank you SO much for sharing this with us, I know it must have been a challenge. Praying!

    ReplyDelete
  26. praying today. kisses from OHIO ... xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  27. Wow, how heartbreaking. I cannot imagine having to go through something like that. Julie, her mom and their family will all be in my prayers tonight.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Lump in my throat. This is so awful & so sad! & Yes, there are days that I catch myself asking "WHY" for so many things! I know we're not supposed to but, sometimes it's just necessary! Praying for your friend Julie & her family! I know this is not an easy time for them at all!

    ReplyDelete
  29. So sorry to hear this. I will add Julie and her family and friends to my prayers. We have been praying daily for a little girl in our community that has a pretty big fight with cancer right now, so I understand the "whys" you have.

    ReplyDelete
  30. My best friend Stephanie lost her mom to cancer in September of this past year. She fought the battle for 11 years- first breast cancer (in which she beat it), then it had moved to her lymph nodes, and finally it spread throughout her entire body. It's such a hard thing to watch your best friend go through. I have never lost a parent, and I just saw that you have, which I am so sorry to hear about... but I do know how much hurt you can feel for another person. Especially one that is more like a sister than anything else. Stay strong for Julie, be there for her, and just let her cry. Many prayers being sent your way and hers.

    ReplyDelete
  31. So many prayers her way. Definitely.

    ReplyDelete
  32. So sad!! Your friend's mom, friend and family will be in my thoughts :(

    ReplyDelete
  33. Sending love and prayers to Ms. Joni and her family. I can't imagine the pain they're going through and I'm so glad Julie has such a good friend in you help her through this.

    ReplyDelete
  34. so sad to hear, i wish her and her family the best

    ReplyDelete
  35. Steph... I am so sorry to hear this. I will be keeping you and your friends in my prayers!
    I find myself asking why a lot lately. Last month we lost my aunt so unexpectedly and I still am not sure I have come to terms with it... it just doesn't make sense and she was only 48yrs old.
    Sometimes it seems like the questions we ask Why to are the ones we will never get the answers for.
    Try and keep your head up, Girlie...

    ReplyDelete
  36. Just saw this post and it really hit home with me. I'm so sorry for your friend and her sweet mom. That is so sad and so hard to deal with. My Gramma is dying from Cancer as well. They gave her 6-12 months to live and it's killing my family and I. She is only 65 and still has so much life left in her. I will be praying for you, your friend and her mom. I hope God can help heal their hearts.

    xo

    ReplyDelete
  37. stephy...i am so behind in reading/commenting so here I am in full force

    this post breaks my heart. I am keeping your friends mom and family in my prayers. It is so true....each and every day is so important...and we don't know what could happen, which is scary. It makes me just want to go grab all my friends and family and hug them tight

    sending SOOO much love and prayers and thoughts and good vibes towards Julie Anne, her mom, and her family..XOXOXOX

    ReplyDelete

I love hearing from my readers! I read each and every comment left on my blog. If you have a specific question, feel free to email me at snhoward16@gmail.com.

Also, please make sure your email address is set up with your profile so that I am able to respond to you. xoxo

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...