December 12, 2012

To My 17-Year-Old Self

Dear self,

You're 17 years old and your biggest responsibility is trying to figure out what you're wearing to Josh's party this weekend. Should you go with the Abercrombie tube top that shows off your mid-drift or the short denim mini skirt and a pair of platform flip flops? Other than homework, your biggest worry is not getting caught drinking and sneaking out on a weekly basis. Your mother will threaten to take away your car, your cell phone, your own "personal" phone line and your AOL privileges but that woman....she really knows what she's doing here.

Thanks to softball and volleyball, you're in the best damn shape of your life. You've got a tight little figure and can wear just about anything without worrying about the way it looks. This thing called "cellulite" doesn't even exist in your vocabulary and your stomach is as flat as your back. (So are your boobs, but don't worry...they'll come soon enough.) You're going to try to walk out the door in the middle of winter wearing nothing but a halter top and the shortest shorts money can buy but don't even try it because you know damn good and well your dad is going to make you march your happy butt right back up those stairs and put on something slightly less revealing.

You're young enough to be able to eat a Big Mac, fries and a large diet coke before your softball game without gaining an ounce. Take advantage of this because in just a few years, you'll gain 4 pounds just looking at those golden arches.{Stupid 26-year-old metabolism...}

You're going to get caught cheating in Government but just know that girl who took all the blame for you will become one of your very best friends. She'll stand next you in her wedding and you'll do the exact same for her. (Thanks, Ash!)

You're also going to get caught skipping lunch by your very own mother. She's going to take your car away for 2 weeks and drive you to and from school every. single. day.. It's gonna suck, and you're going to resent her for it but let's be honest, we all know good and well that you were up to no good anyways so it's just better off that she teaches you that lesson early on.

You're going to get called into the principal's office for harassing the girl your ex cheated on you with. Pushing her into walls and leaving her death threats on her car are going to get you no where but suspended. (Also see: You're not going to marry him anyways...) Keep it class, honey.

You're going to sneak out of your best friends house every other weekend and stay out until the sun comes up. You'll only "almost" get caught once but it's okay because your best friend's mom will cover for you no matter what. Just brush your teeth and no one will know a thing...

Oh...and that "older football player" you dated for a couple years, ya, it doesn't work out. You're gonna break up the day after prom and play the whole "let's get back together" card for another year or two but just know you're not going to marry him anyway. Your life is not "over" and you're going to live. Trust me...

Ya. You'll graduate from high school and run off to college and follow your cleat-chasing dreams when you meet a baseball player turned frat guy. You'll go through hell and back to win him over but once you do, you're set. He'll be charming and sweet and a family-man who will sweep you off your feet and will one day call you his bride.

You'll learn a lot this year in your life and make so many wonderful memories but just know you're life is really just beginning...

Love always,

Your 26-year-old self

39 comments:

  1. Thinking about you pushing a girl against walls in high school cracked me up. It's crazy the things that were so important to us in those days are non existent in our lives now. Love the post! p.s. Can't wait to find out if y'all will be in your NEW house for Christmas!

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    1. LOL I was so classy, wasn't I?! Geez Louise! What was I thinking?!

      PS-we're closing on our house NEXT Friday!!! :))))

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  2. ok seriously this made my day!! i am laughing so hard!!! cutest post ever!! it is crazy how those little things totally mattered back then, and if it didnt work out our lives were over. but...then we realize things happen for a reason and it makes us who we are.
    would love to know what you did to win your man over....youve got me curious ;)

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  3. this is fabulous! very cool post my dear, as always, you are a joy to follow!
    xo

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  4. Love this post... it is soo true! If we only knew then what we know now. :)
    It's actually fun to spill the beans to my mom now about all the stuff I used to do that she never knew about! But there's definitely a threshold of age where you have to be before you do this... like if you do it too soon she still may be able to punish you or something. But now that I've passed that (I think its like 25 or something) I've started to tell her about sneaking out until 4 am and coming back in the sliding glass door in the basement so she and my dad wouldn't hear us... or about all the stupid times we bridge jumped from an overpass into the river when it was pitch black outside and midnight.... oh vey that was dumb.

    You, my dear, were a little rebel too!

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  5. This is so cute. It reminds me of myself a lot. It's funny how back then things that seemed like a big deal actually mean nothing now and it's kind of a good lesson to be optimistic about bad days. Everything will be different in 10 years so no sense dwelling on negativity.

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  6. Love this post! It's crazy looking back the things we think will break us, that seem so silly as adults.

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  7. Little ms badass, ha! Love this! So cute!

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  8. adore this post, and too funny about the death threats and pushing that chick, get 'em girl. I recently told my mom about some of the things I did in high school and while she laughed, I could tell that she was trying to think of ways to punish me still in the back of her mind ;)

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  9. Whoa whoa whoa. How come I haven't heard about you pushing a girl into walls and threatening her? Is this me you speak of? LOL

    I'd like to add "you'd travel around the U.S to meet a stranger and her husband at a random airport and sleep at her place for 5 days". The best part in my mind. :) text me this story now please

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  10. Haha your outfits sound identical to mine back then! I'd come down the stairs and my dad would say "Don't you think you should be wearing something else/more?" I'd say "Nope" and run out the door but if my mom was around she'd demand me to march back up the stairs and change. That's when I started stuffing those tiny little skirts and tube tops into my Polo Sport pocketbook *oy*. I don't know why we all thought we looked so cute like that! But those seriously were the days! So.much.fun.

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  11. Dang girl, you were into some craziness as a 17-year-old! But then again, I guess most of us were, huh? And even still, it sounds like it was fun :) This was a good post, thanks for sharing!

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  12. I think we may have been the same exact person. I always downed a Big Mac right after my softball games (even after my softball games when I played in college!) and never gained an ounce. Dated the "older" football player. Obviously that didn't work out. Went to college and was a total cleat chaser (but I think that is totally ok since I played softball, right?!?), eventually landing me one smoking hot baseball player. Snuck out in high school and took my parents car when I was 15. Got grounded and my dad cut my cell phone off, and he drove me to school because they took my car away. Got called into the princpal's office to get lectured on not sneaking out because I was a role model and that looked bad...oops again. Oh, and the first time I put mascara on my dad made me go take it off. He said it wasn't age appropriate yet...what?!?!

    Basically, I think we could be best friends in real life bc we are essentially the same person!

    Loved this post!!

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    1. HAHAHAHAA yup! You pretty much just summed up my entire senior year!!! So funny!! And yes...cleat-chasing is totally okay when you're an athlete, too! ;)

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  13. I love this! It's crazy looking back at the stuff we used to do thinking "wow if I had only known what I know now.." :-) Great post!

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  14. I just love this. It is so true and I always think about this... wishing I could go back and remember that the world is SO much bigger than I thought when I was 17 and everything was such an earth shattering big deal.

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  15. You should of included those classy photos of you in that skirt. LMFAO!

    I have football tonight forgot to tell ya. 7&9 you should come!

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    1. 3 reasons you love me!

      A. Jeff said he would check and everything looks like its a go for next friday.
      2. I called the cable company and are service will be terminated on the 20th and we have 10 days to return the equipment.
      & D. I am figureing out the movers to come on the 21st afternoon.

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  16. i LOVE this. I have been meaning to write one myself!!!
    If only we really could write a letter to ourselves back then and let us read it..the things we would say!!!

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  17. Oooo girl, we were clearly the same person at age 17...right down to the platinum flipflops! :-) loved this!

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  18. This is funny & sweet all at the same time! I love it! Who knew you had such 'tude!? Pushing a girl & leaving threatening notes?? HAHA! Love it!

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  19. Girlfriend, we were two of a kind! You always have me rolling laughing. I wish I could have a chat with my 17 year old self... I would say, "HE'S NOT WORTH IT!!!!"

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  20. I used to wear midriff tops like it was going out of style! Life was so much simpler back then, we were so young but somehow still thought we knew it all. Those were the days...not that I would ever ever want to go back to being a teenager!

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  21. abercrombie tube tops. YES! My fav Abercrombie top was an orange one that said "Strike like a bee" and it had a bee on it with a little diamond. CLASS ACT. Actually I still wear their shorts HAHAH shh dont tell

    i love this steph! all so so true....the big mac thing never gaining a pound. WHAT HAPPENED!! I mean, i feel like you can still eat anythign and not gain a teeny ounce. But yeah i used to come home from school, eat ramen or mac and cheese as a pre dinner snack, and THEN dinner. DAMN

    pushing girls into walls...BAD GIRRRRL

    bbaall player turned frat boy..who could that beeee :)

    love you girl!
    xoxoox

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  22. I love your posts! Your honesty is hilarious and refreshing!
    Good luck next Friday!!!!

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  23. L.O.V.E this!!! Great post Steph!

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  24. L.O.V.E this!!! Great post Steph!

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  25. I love this! Too funny! I love looking back like this... too bad you didn't have a letter FROM yourself at 17 to your future self. hehe

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  26. This is a great post!!! It's crazy to think back on our teenage years and remember what was happening and important to us :)

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  27. Great post! It cracked me up, because it was so true! Abercrombie and platform flip flops... those were the days! It also reminds me of the high school kids I teach, they seem to think this is as big as their world will get but I just sit there and think, oh if only you knew...

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  28. Dang girl! You were the girl that I wanted to be in HS; not gonna lie! I was a meek little bookworm who never got invited to parties and fell asleep right after senior prom. I'm such a lame-oooo. haha!!

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  29. Oh man, if only I could tell my younger self things that she would listen to... Hahah! This post is great :)

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  30. Cute post!!
    And yes, if we could only continue to eat that much McDonald's now and still not have cellulite...we can dream I guess!!

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  31. Isn't it funny how you probably heard MOST of that advice when you were 17 and you chose not to listen? I think about that often. If I could tell myself then things I know now, I wouldn't have listened anyone. I guess when your young, ignorance is bliss!!!

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  32. Oh I love this post! Such a cute idea! A&F and platform flip flops were the greatest fashion statement ever!

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  33. I never really took you as the pushing girls into walls type of girl! But isn't it funny how our moms really do know more than we think they do??? Crazy, isn't it? Cute!

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  34. Love this letter and such a good idea... If only we knew then what we know now! Amazing how much we would have changed although I am always grateful for the lessons I have learnt and the person I have moulded into because of those life experiences.
    x

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